Who am I and is It Good Enough?

Why is my reflection someone 
I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am
Though I've tried.
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

 

Who am I?  I question the things that define me a lot as I try to find out who I really am.  Sure, I am William Hagendoerm, but I don't know much else about myself.  Sometimes I just look at myself in a mirror and question if I really am me.

Other people seem to know me better than I do.  Even people who I think are complete strangers can at least recognize me as the kid who was in the crash.  My parents seem to know me as their son, and someone who is going to make something of myself one day.  My Grandmother knows me as, well her memory is going so I'm not completely sure if she knows who I am.  My teachers have called me a resilient and hard working student. My peers know me as someone who is involved in school extracurricular activities. At my Profession of Faith, my pastor said that I was full of love and perseverance.   My aunts and uncles probably know me as the loud and annoying nephew.  They say that I am these things, but, I don't know if I am. I am afraid of these titles because what if I let them down?

I don't know who I am. I guess that I am more artsy than athletic or academic.  Though I am sort of athletic and not dumb.  

I play piano, cello, guitar.  I sing a lot.  But I am not good enough to make it into a career or anything.  I can paint and sketch, but they are really just doodles compared to the work of others.  I can take pictures and alter them but I am not a photographer.  

I play golf sometimes.  Mostly because my dad and my brother like it.  I was on the volleyball team last year but I doubt I can play this year with my knee the way it is.  And I wasn't really the athletic type anyways.  I am not a jock. I won't be getting any full ride sports scholarships.

My grades are decent.  I take the music and the art classes, but also the maths and the sciences. I always manage honors.  But I am not a genius.  I wouldn't be accepted into medical school. And there is no way I would be able to become a lawyer, no matter how badly my dad wants me to take over his firm.
I am not horrible at very many things.  But I am not the best at any of them.  Everyone has a talent but I just have half talents really, I can manage doing a lot of things, but good at something would be pushing it.
A lot of the time, it is just easier to point out our faults. It is easiest to say that we are not god enough.  We push away what we are good at and just focus on what needs to be done better. It is what our society has done.  We are never perfect.  Never smart enough, never athletic enough, never original.  If you have a six-pack, alright, but Taylor Lautner has an eight-pack.  So what, you are going to Med school, you don't look like the doctors on the TV dramas.  Meh, you can sing, so what? Finn can sing, dance and he is the star quarterback. You might find out who you are, but when you do, you still don't feel like who you are is good enough. 
I find myself trying to live up to how others see me and how society thinks I should be without just being content with who I am. 
Maybe if I just accept who I am, I won't be wondering, I'll know.  Maybe if we all start to accept ourselves, people won't be traveling around the world to find themselves or going through midlife crises to rediscover who they are.
I am seventeen, and people are expecting me to tell them my life's plans. They want to know where I am going to university, what job I am going to get after. They want to know who I will be in ten years. I don't even know who I am today, let alone tomorrow or ten years down the road.  Why can't they just be satisfied with, "I don't know?"